“We are never really angry at the thing we think we are upset about”
Here is a story that happened to me a few days ago…
I woke up to my husband making cashew milk in our shitty blender while our Vitamix was in repair. The blender was overly full and milk was gently spilling from all sides.
The sight of it triggered a sudden burst of anger within me. I immediately started lecturing him about how to use that blender. I knew better. I wasn’t making a mess when using it.
“Why aren’t you listening to me, if you did, there would be no mess” I shouted.
As I went more about it, the anger amplified.
Knowing better than to engage in this nonsense, my partner took me in his arms and asked me “Are you okay? What is actually going on?”
I was immediately overwhelmed by a sense of deep sadness. After sharing a few tears, the truth revealed itself.
Believe it or not, it had nothing to do with spilled milk. Nothing to do with him not listening to my groundbreaking advice about how to use the shitty blender.
The sight of the milk overflowing from its lid was the perfect reflection of how I had been feeling inside for the past week.
I had been overly full, spinning out of control, my emotions spilling from all sides. When I said “why aren’t you listening to me? If you did, there would be no mess” I actually meant: I need your attention right now, because there is a big mess inside of me.
Whatever triggers strong emotions and reactions on the outside, always reflects unattended pain within ourselves.
I hope you try to attend to yourself with loving compassion and kind curiosity today.
Love xx
Emilie